The Poor in Pouring

            Now, I’m not pointing out the obvious here (promise). My student budget and I are quite well aware of the fact that el vino can set you back a few bob – looking at you Bordeaux. But in this case, I’m not referring to the (empty) pocket situation, but rather the form. ‘Manners maketh man’ according to Colin Firth and his spy cohort, and when it comes to wine there is undeniably an etiquette that goes with it. However, what I’m quickly coming to realize having now spent 4 months in France and 4 in Italy, is that said etiquette is not remotely uniform. It’s not exactly a secret that the Brits don’t go hand in hand with the European status quo – there so very many options for a poor Brexit joke to be inserted here, so I’ll leave that up to your imagination – but with regards to wine, considering they didn’t even make the stuff until recent years, they seemingly put the wine-wise Europeans to shame in the Pouring Stakes.

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Or do they? Etiquette, after all, stems from culture and the society that culture includes, so it’s little wonder that it varies from country to country. Now, if I were to break it down from life experience it would go something like this…
Let’s start with what we’re used to:

• The Brits: I have, on more than one occasion, been apologized to after I poured my own glass of wine. The British Male is indeed an odd species, but I can't deny that the importance they place on ensuring all glasses are full at alltimes both endearing and extremely useful. Letting a glass go empty is a sin on a par with refusing to wait in a unnecessary queue or giving up on a barbeque when it starts raining. 
• The French: A polite 3 glasses over civilized a 3 hours, steady sipping and steady pouring. They drink the wine to enjoy it, not to get boozed – probably how it should be really (but not exactly going to light the world on fire anytime soon). 
• The Italians: It’s true they’re known for their wild gesticulation with hands being thrown left, right and center – but it seems their pouring arm is significantly less active. Don’t get me wrong, they’re all about a good time, but if you want it then you’ll be pouring it yourself. Frankly I’ve never been afraid of a little DIY, so works for me.
• The Austrians: There’s a lot of beer. And it’s rowdy. And there’s a lot of beer. But if there is wine in the equation you can rest assured an impressive quantity will be drunk (in tandem with the beer) and all pouring arms involved are leaning towards the Pop Eye side of the scale. 
• The Germans: See above, but without a sense of humour.
• The Irish: See above again, but with enough sense of humour (and Guinness) to sink a small ship.
• The Americans: I’d like to take this moment to point out that the whole No-Booze-Till-21 situation is just a little ridiculous. There are around 20 million Americans aged between 18-21, who all happily find their local fake ID supplier and then trot off to the nearest bar anyway…which also means there more than 20 million felons in the country (not ideal if you ask me).  However, the real issue is that when they do drink it more often then not tends to be in the stream of an inordinate amount of nasty tasting spirits and beer that, according to my fellow eloquent Englishmen, ‘tastes like piss’. Lovely. 

N.B. I am of course aware there are a few more nationalities knocking around, but let's face it, we haven't got all bloody day.

So is there a right or wrong when it comes to wine etiquette, or is it really just a question of falling in line with the rest of your nation? Personally I think it should come down to what works for you. Some like taking it steady (given that the majority of people reading this blog will be either English or Austrian, I realize this is a foreign concept for you, but yes, it does happen). Admittedly I’m more partial to having a well-attended glass, but given that my DNA is 50/50 English/Austrian perhaps the life of the reserved and constrained was never really going to work for me.
 
On the topic of etiquette, I should probably also mention that there’s a whole host of Do’s and Don’ts in terms of how to pour wine/how to chill wine/how to hold a glass etc etc, the list is in equal measures endless and boring, so I’m going to save you the trouble of reading about it, and me the trouble writing about it. What I will bestow on you all is this *Top tip* (sounds official that way no?): hold a wine glass by it’s stem, not by the ‘bowl bit’– keeping your grubby mitts in the right place not only means that your wine will stay fresher without the influence of heat, but also that you’ll look like you have a semblance of an idea of what you’re talking about…which is always nice.
 
Happy wining all, I hope the summer rosé is flowing well,
P x

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